55. Forgiveness

Last night I sat at the edge of the world watching the crashing waves. The rest of the family was at a church function.

I was repenting.

Each wave reminded me of my behavior earlier that evening before I had to go to choir practice, angry and loud and forceful. I sat with what is, but only after throwing myself a big self-pity party. I only invited one friend. Who arrived after all the crying and precisely when I needed her to.

I wanted forgiveness.

And so, I told myself over and over again that 'I easily forgive myself and others' as I walked home in the dark. I left each of my children letters after the outburst, and I was greeted with acceptance, love, hugs, and this response...

Dear Mom thank you for the note I no you have the fores. (as in the 'force' from Star Wars) When you are sad you have the power to pray fro love Matthew

...and forgiveness.